Monday, July 26, 2010

Luke should eat more dairy

Good grief, there are no words to describe this weekend.

.....Oh wait a minute, yes there are! Quite a bit, actually!

I'll just deliver the punchline right now. We went Paintballing, and Luke broke his leg. Bwaaaaaaaaa

How did he do it? Simple. He ran about twenty feet. In a straight line. Guess he just landed his right foot the wrong way and *crunch*. It really puts things into perspective, you know. Cuz when we go running for AF PT, we'll go maybe 2 miles? Man, eff that, now.

All I remember is sitting on the sidelines, chilling while people shot at eachother, because I had been shot out of the game early AGAIN. And all of a sudden I see Luke going:

Luke: Okay u guyz! We gonna run out and shoot people with paintballs! Herp Derp!

(running.... running.... CRUNCH!)

Luke: Ow! My tibia and fibia!!

Thats right folks, dude didn't just break his leg, he destroyed it. Both Tibia and Fibia got blow'd up.

So this is all terrible news, but it gets even terrible-er. For three reasons!

1) Location. Location. Location. When he chose to destroy his leg, he chose to do so while we were in one of the two deep woods courses. We had trekked quite a bit into the woods to partake in the "WWII course", over the river and through the woods and up and down steep dirt paths and across a rickety bridge about half a person wide. And we of course had to carry his fat ass back! Luke could at least have had the common decency to injure himself at one of the 4 courses adjacent to the parking lot. faaaaaakkkkkkk

2) Luke is getting married. In two weeks. Thats right, this was all a part of his bachelor party, for our hero Luke will be marrying the lovely Mandi in two weeks. His injury is unfortunately such that he will have to crutch himself down the aisle, and he will not be able to dance :( No jokes here, that's legitimately sad, and I feel for the guy. When Mandi got to the hospital, you could tell that she wasn't mad, she was really quite concerned and just wanted to make sure her guy was okay. But she is also not amused >.>

3) The very day before, Luke wrecked his car. Need I say more? Not really.

Soo..... yeeeaaaaaa......

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